Sing Along

I should have kept my mouth shut.

It's honestly the worst idea I've ever had.

It's too late now though. It's out there, and people think it's great.

I was watching TV and a movie trailer came on. Lately, the movies hitting theatres have been especially bad, almost to a heinous degree.

Each time a particularly girly one comes out, I jokingly suggest to Brandon that we go see it at our local theatre: an establishment that irresponsibly serves alcohol to its guests viewing its features from the balcony level.

For Sex and the City, he intelligently rejected the idea. The Women was also shot down, along with Mamma Mia! the first time around. That'd be only slightly funny and really gay.

But when Universal decided to re-release Mamma Mia! theatrically in a sing-along format, something truly awful was spawned.

Suddenly, being loud in a movie theatre is being encouraged.

Those “Silence Is Golden” promos are powerless against lyrics lighting up the bottom of the screen.

And the only thing worse than a theatre full of people singing along to terrible Swedish pop music from the seventies is a theatre full of drunk people singling along to terrible Swedish pop music from the seventies.

Brandon immediately got on the phone to test the reaction:

“Hey, this Friday, we're gonna see Mama Mia!.”

“What's that?”

“It's a musical.”


“It's based off the hits of ABBA.”


“We'll be singing along.”

“That sounds terrible.”


“I'm in.”

God help us all.

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